i'm jelezz hokee...hmm :||

Assalamualaikumwbt to my dearies...a big HYEEEE uols.. :))

dah lame since my last update rite.hee ..kalo ikot kn aty macam nak deactivate dh blog nih tapi sayang jgak skali sekale nak mrepek xde tmpat ydop..coret2 arini meleret2 sgat..so kalo free bole la spend time read diz..if not..juz ignore...no tacing2 :)

 btw..diz past 2 years had change me to a better person..yeaa..i'm not a girl anymore but not yet a woman..hee =P  not me my self had change..my frens especially the ex-schoolmates (primary nor secondary) and ex-matrics also come thru diz phase.. appearance is one thing i notice among my dearies nowadays.... more fashionable, prettier and mature i guess...but i really respects those who already make the HIJRAH and  stay istiqamah..i kind of jealous seeing them so calm and happy and live the life to please Allah solely...

i cant imagine how wonderful hidayah from Allah they had accepted till they so strong and full of faith facing all the critics from surroundings, the never ending questions from family, friends and public for their Hijrah especially who come from family yang biase2..family members yg tak pakai tudung labuh, niqab, serban or what not...i know islam is not just about the dressing..maybe i'm not that arif about hukum hakam and juz be kind of stereotype..okee...tak nak cakap lebey2 sal nie..takot tersilap kang..haaa mati den tanggung dose...nauzubillah min zalik >,<"  

after diz while i just listen to my  frens who slowly change their way of dressing and kept their distance as it involve hanging out with guys..hati terdetik nak berubah jugak tapi takot tak istiqamah (dats my big probs..always tak tetap pdirian)..rase diri nie lemah sangat bile sorang2..nak2 ble dh balik campus masing2..xde kawan dh nak tolong bagi kata2 semangat untuk terus berubah..bukan la nak kate frens kat u x baek..cume dey ol juz like me..the 'biase2' one..hee..still rase nak enjoy, ikot trending, coupling and so on..we know the halal and haram and tuntutan bpakaian as muslim and muslimah..but most of the time kami kalah...sob2 ..ibarat kate iman senipis kulit bawang..plus..i'm not used to go for usrah and that kind of activities held in surau or masjid due to teman n time restrictions..okee...most of the time malas is the exact word =P hee

yesterday....i found my junior's fb and blog..she is a girl a fren of mine had skandal2 during schooldays..=(  she's among the hottest junior la according to him...i cant recall who she is cuz i'm not used to tawaf the school to peep on others..haha bajet baek sangat laa kan..besides, there's quite a few girls i actually notice have similar faces..or is it me yg blur2 xkenal org buat2 kenal..haha  okee back to the story..so ble dh hot of cos la ramai yg nak try..so i dont know what to think of her..maybe la kan cam biase..ade la yg brubah status..single to double/triple/quadraple...heee merepek jea..soo..she juz like us yg 'biase' nih..

then, what i got after godek2 fb n blog dy..she already had her Hijrah..alhamdulillah..she also wear niqab whenever outside the school...it makes me thinking, how can she berubah all of sudden...as far as i concern..hotties difficult to change cuz dey still in their 'famous mode' rite...forgive me if i'm wrong..diz only from my view la..usually after finished schooling then we are expose with the usrah and more beneficial activities utk mantapkn akidah and what not...tapi diz girl still in school and our school is not a sekolah agama ..so how come she able to do such changes in her life..how she gain the strength to face and answer questions from peoples around..she's too young for me as she do the Hijrah..or i''m jahil about diz..?_?
memang terharu sangat mase baca blog dy...blog dy xde laa meleret mcm nih..hihi...nih nak qada 2 tahon x menulis...

so ttbe diri ni rase malu sangat..adik2 pon berani untuk berubah for Islam..hotties pulak tu..why not me..kalo nk cmpare memang xde pape la kan..so insaf kejap smalam..arini i try my best utk pkai baju yang longgar2 huhu..hopefully i won't change juz to pleased peoples around..or bcz of trending..or bcoz of competing factors..ya allah...ssnguhnya Engkau maha mengetahui apa yg ade dalm stiap hati hambaMU..sekian

*nak cite satu2 kng panjang sgat jadi nyer..so byak dh tapis2..hope xde yg slah faham pasal coret2 nie oke..

*semoga hari2 esk lebih baek dari hari2 sblomnye..

*penat dh mngarang..huhu kalo ade recorder kn senang..cakap jea byak mane pon..